The best slightly alternative self-esteem boost for men
Men are generally not very good at talking about feelings or emotions. It’s not a requirement of being a man to be like this but it’s pretty common all the same.
Sometimes, for instance, I will not even recognise that I’ve had an emotion until it is long gone. I can look back at my behaviour and think, yes I was probably sad back then, but at the time I had no idea that’s how I felt.
Other times I can be quite aware that I’m sad or angry or excited – but definitely a lot slips past my emotion radar.
It’s this sort of unawareness that can make it difficult for some chaps to accept complements.
– You look nice today, Bill.
And Bill thinks he’s done something wrong – you’re luring him into a false sense of security.
Or maybe someone says…
Nice outfit today, Bill.
And Bill thinks his clothes must be weird because they have attracted unsolicited attention.
No one is left with an improved self-esteem through these activities.
But as humans, there is no greater bonus to your overall self-confidence than when you fix something, while spending nothing.
This type of joy makes everyone feel good, no matter how manly and distant they may seem.
To get the pure self-esteem high, you need to solve whatever problem you have using only the tools and materials in your house. It’s the greatest challenge.
Take that toilet lock at the top of this post. It’s not the perfect fix, but it’s functional. It keeps the baddies away when you really need to do some serious nose-powdering.
Someone must have lost one-half of their toilet lock and thought – hey, I know what to do. Five minutes later the problem was fixed with one screwdriver and one screw – and I bet that person felt elated.
No awkward trip to the hardware store. No money spent on boring things. Awesome.
I once fixed our TV by snipping a wire with a pair of scissors (I own wire cutters but I always lose them).
It was changing through channels of it’s own accord – and it had been for the last 6 months – enough was enough.
I had to work my way carefully but quite forcefully into the back of the TV because they’re not really designed for opening. I’d worked out that it was probably the buttons on the TV that were malfunctioning. So I snipped the relevant wire like a bomb expert, wrapped it in some electric tape and plugged the TV back in.
Everything was back to normal and I wished I had done it 5 months earlier. But I also felt awesome. I rang some of my friends that had experienced our nightmare TV just to tell them the great news.
Steve knows this because he was one of the people I phoned.
But to win the game and the associated happiness, you can’t spend money on stuff – the more you spend the less happy you feel.
That’s why we buy tools in advance I guess – you never know when a laser-shooting spirit level might save the day and therefore make you feel like beautiful royalty.