The best thing to do when it starts to get cold cold


This is how I dress to go outside now. I’ve got nowhere to go from here. I’m stuck if temperatures drop any more.

Britain, what are you doing?! You lulled me into a false sense of security with your unseasonably warm October and the hottest Halloween since records began. I’m not warm any more though. In fact, I’m cold.

Are you happy now?!

It’s strange when the unexpected happens. Firstly because it’s unexpected but secondly because it starts to feel like the norm. In my head, Britain would never get cold again. Our winter would be delightfully mild and I wouldn’t feel one single shiver the entire year. I thought we would be the new LA albeit with a little more rain.

However, as it stands, I’m writing this post in four layers, one of which is a coat designed to go skiing in. The temperature has dropped and I would say it’s cold cold.

Once we reach this terrible temperature we need to fight it as much as we can. I know some people who enjoy this time of year because they are sadists and like feeling uncomfortable, but, for me, I like being warm and not dressing as an onion.

Therefore, I have come up with some sure fire ways for you to stay toasty as the winter-y weather descends on us in force:

1) Layer up – use whatever you can find, t-shirts, trousers, tea towels, as long as it begins with t

2) Buy some hand-warmers – there are plenty of these available and are nothing short of wizardry. You crack ’em and you get nice and cosy hands in your pockets. Gone are the days of giving ice cold handshakes in winter.

Hand warmers

Crack a disc and get warm hands. It couldn’t be easier.

3) Turn on your heating – we’ve played the no heating game long enough in my house and it has been suggested that we finally turn it on. I was happy to cave.

4) Huddle – like the penguins do!

Penguins huddling

“Hey everybody look down here!” “What is it? What is it?! WHAT IS IT?!”

5) Do some exercise – not a practical long term solution but it’ll get your blood and sweat going. The tears will come from the shock when you go outside afterwards.

6) If all else fails, burn some stuff – fire is, after all, the oldest method of central heating. Remember, fires should always be attended to and, if the fire is boring, throw on some magnesium, that’s sure to liven up the party.

Burning magnesium

Well I hope that helps. Especially if you live somewhere which is actually cold. It’s probably about 4 degrees here and I’m complaining, it’s really not that bad. But, if you are from a colder part of the world, definitely get some hand-warmers. You’ll receive thanks from your thumb to your pinky.