The best way to describe walking
Walking is a common aspect of life. We walk to the shops, we walk to the cinema (or at least we walk from our cars to these places) and it’s something we learn from such a young age.
However, I worry that it can sometimes be looked down on, particularly by those snobby runner types. If you need to walk from A to B then you should do that. You don’t have to run. You can get there a bit later and less sweaty.
Therefore, some action must be taken to prevent walkers getting a complex about not doing enough exercise and I believe I have the answer. Kind of.
If walking is your form of exercise it needs to be described as “slow-motion running”. For one thing, it has the word running in its name, appealing to those health freaks, and secondly, most things look better in slow-motion. In fact, there’s an entire Youtube channel devoted to slow-motion.
So when you walk just be like “check me and my slow-motion running”, I can guarantee others will be jealous and wish they were walking to.
But this beautiful idea doesn’t need to end at running, we can apply it to other aspects of our life. If you are a slow reader then you are slow-motion skim reading. If you are a slow thinker then you have slow-motion wit.
Finally, and perhaps most importantly, if you always lose at Hungry Hungry Hippos because you can’t press the lever fast enough, you’re just slow-motion pushing. Everyone else is going too fast.
They don’t even appreciate the game.
As a small aside, check out these spoof movie posters for a film called Hungry Hungry Hippos. These should definitely be made…