The best things according to Google maps

maps best things

So, Steve has thrown down the gauntlet. His contribution to double-post Friday was pretty whiny. What a wierdo.

But that means I have to make this ultra positive to bring some balance to the world. And as usual, when faced with a difficult challenge, I’ve looked to outsource the problem and let someone else do the work.

I took myself over to Google maps and decided to ask them where the best things were. It didn’t take long before I found a whole host of amazing places that sound amazing.

I’ve included their addresses so if you live near, you have somewhere new to visit. If you don’t though you’ll have to settle for going there only in your dreams and thought experiments.

So let’s start with something pretty important…

Oh great Google maps, where is the best party in the world?

best party

Oh, there it is… in Kent.

So now you know… I imagine it’s non-stop raving, off the charts. I always suspected Bexleyheath was the party capital of the universe. They have hoola-hoops and cow clothes so that’s good enough for me.

What about if I’ve got a pest problem though? Where should I go to deal with that?

 

roach killer

South Africa is apparently home to the best Roach killer ever… so good he needs two exclamation marks.

That picture is actually a guy dressed as a cockroach, not the great Roach-killer himself. He’s notoriously shy actually.

So you’re looking for the best cheesecakes? 

 

best cheesecake

Look no further than Japan… actually that’s quite far.

Still it’s good to know… thanks Google Maps.

Now what about if you’re trying to give your kid some style tips?

Well, don’t worry – here’s where the best dressed child in the world lives…

The best dressed child

He’s so classy, he drinks his milk in a wine glass

Take your kid along and hope the fashion is contagious.

Now that Tesco has stopped selling your favourite horse meat dishes,you’ll probably be looking for your next supplier of equine treats.

Fortunately, there’s good news if you live in New Zealand…

horse takeaways

Delicious horse takeaways!

Google maps really does have an answer to everything…

But what if I just want to focus on being myself…

Being the best me I can be. Where should I go for that?

best you can be

Ken doll is already the best he can be…

Turns out I should go to Amsterdam, NY. That’s where all the best people go… If you’re serious about fulfilling your potential, head there right now.

What left to say but a huge thank you to Google maps for showing us such a wide variety of mad places.

They have a pretty odd definition of “best” but that’s ok.

Happy double post Friday everybody – hope you get some delicious horse takeaway tonight.

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