The best way to destroy something beautiful
Recently my housemate bought a bunch of daffodils. I’m not quite sure why. Maybe it was because his fiance was coming round, maybe it was because he was full of the joys of Spring or maybe it was because he just did. I don’t know.
What I do know is that a couple of weeks ago a vase of daffodils appeared on my dining room table.
It was nice. They brightened up the room and made it feel like we were inching towards summer. As I’m sure most of you would agree, daffodils look pretty beautiful and they gave me something to stare at whilst I ate my breakfast so I was pretty happy.
The days went by and the daffodils were still there, adding a dash of nature to my urban environment. As time passed, they began to wilt and eventually they died.
Me being me, I just left them there.
Sure they looked a bit sad but they also reminded me of a time when we had new flowers and that was nice. Plus, I’m not very good at the whole domesticated thing – let’s just say I take a very ‘hands off’ approach to cleaning.
My housemate also didn’t seem too bothered and we were quite happy just letting them chill in this vase of water.
A few days post-death of the daffodils my housemate started to smell something odd at dinner. He did the classic, sniff ’til you hyperventilate and look like an airport dog. It was fairly unfruitful and he gave up. I couldn’t smell anything so I decided he must be going crazy.
A couple of days later I was sat on the sofa after the gym, not having showered, and I too smelled something odd. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. It was just a smell that shouldn’t be there.
I eventually came to the conclusion it was me and my sweat and that it smelled odd because sweat doesn’t normally feature prominently in my relatively sedentary lifestyle.
But even after I was relatively clean, it still smelled odd.
Because it was so peculiar, I started sniffing around and had the bright idea that it might be coming from the daffodils. The beautiful dead daffodils.
I was right.
It was awful.
No word of a lie, they smelled like poo. 100%.
It was probably one of the worst things I have smelled in a long time. Getting up close and personal with a dead set of daffodils marinading in water is a terrible thing. Do not do it.
My housemate decided a good idea would be to throw the water down the kitchen sink. It wasn’t a good idea.
Our kitchen absolutely reeked of this dead daffodil odour for a long time because of that simple error – not even Oust could oust it!
Now, the smell has finally left our kitchen but I’ll never look at daffodils in the same way.
Their beauty has been destroyed in me…