The best TV audio description

Over a year ago I bought a TV.

It was initially a real hassle. Firstly, because I decided I would get my bartering hat on and, secondly, because the fifty aerial plugs in our living room didn’t work.

The story starts with my trip to Curry’s, followed by a trip to Argos and then followed by a return to Curry’s with vital pricing information in my head. After this I had a go at haggling.

Initially I was successful and I received a reduction on the price of the showroom TV, I felt on top of the world. So I drove home, new TV in tow, and decided to set it up straight away. However, it quickly dawned on me that the remote didn’t work which was sad because I now had to sort this out rather than just sitting watching terrible daytime TV.

I decided picking up a new remote from Argos would be cheaper than Curry’s so I went there to get one, ignoring the fact that Curry’s would happily have given me another remote for free. I bought this remote from Argos, returned home, tried to work out what to do and realised the remote was incompatible with the TV.

Now I was pretty frustrated and had to return the remote to Argos and then pick up another remote from Curry’s. Well, Curry’s gave me a free new remote, I went home, tried this out, it didn’t work, I shouted really loudly!

In my anger I threw my new TV in the car, drove to Curry’s, fumingly asked for a refund and then bought a TV from Argos at cost price. Good work on the haggling!

But now I had a TV. Everything was looking up. It had Freeview in-built and a faux wood effect. It was classy. The next hurdle was to set it up.

This was not to be an easy task.

We have many, many mysterious cables emanating from our living room wall, remnants of a time when satellite was common, or TV aerials were a different shape, or just some outright weird ones.

Anyway, out of all these cables, none of them fit into the TV slot.

I felt like I could explode. Why can’t I just watch TV? Why won’t it work? Why must you taunt me?

After a discussion with my housemate we deduced that the only way to receive TV was via an archaic satellite dish on the side of our house, for which we must buy a Freesat TV box, so much for my built-in Freeview.

I diligently bought this box after having a good long rant at the world and tried to plug it in. This too didn’t work!

But don’t worry. This story has a happy ending. We eventually got someone to fit another satellite dish at a pretty hefty cost and we connected up our Freesat box. I think I’ve been holding that story of frustration in for about a year, it was nice to get it out.

The story doesn’t quite end there. After a few months of living in unaffected TV bliss, our Freesat box decided it didn’t like us any more and started turning on Audio Description for every TV show, all the time.

Now, whenever I start watching any programme I forget that AD is on until it says something like: “George looks longingly at Joanna whose quivering lip betrays her inner feelings.”

It’s pretty funny really. Kind of.

This post is slightly different to the others, it’s high on words and low on pictures. It’s not particularly witty nor positive. But that’s what life is all about. It’s a mixed bag!

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